6 months after the baby born, i thought life would be less difficult. I've finally keeping up with the baby, manage to get 5 hours uninterrupted sleeps, learn the baby daily pattern and most importantly, successfully breastfeed the precious baby.
Well, our breastfeed journey wasn't easy. We don't have a good start. I have no idea on how to do it and nobody there to teaches me. When the baby one weeks old, she was nipple confused. Poor latching, low milk supply, sore nipples, you named it and i experienced each of them. I almost gave up after 3 weeks but some distant determination keeps me going. On my baby reaching one month old, i quitted formula feeding and began breastfeeding exclusively.
We had a wonderful times that i thought would last forever until i recently learn (or shall i say admit) that people were talking behind my back. I have had instincts that not everyone shares our joy in breastfeeding. I would admit that i shamelessly flashed my breasts in public (note: people other than husband and baby) to feed my baby.
During family gathering or visiting relatives, i would breastfeed my baby as and when needed. Often, in living hall full of people. While i thought it was an OK, well, it is not. The husband reveals that sister in law (or maybe him using SIL as proxy) insists that i put on nursing cover. I was badly hurts by that notion. I thought we are on the same league as she too breastfed. Well ok she don't breastfed in front of my husband and even if so, they are siblings. I am just an in law. How injustice and cruel it was? I would have gone to one of the rooms in their house if i knew it. But then people will keep coming in and out. Or maybe nursing in bathrooms? Should consider that. Privacy is scarce.
Sometimes, i feel like everyone against me nursing my baby. A cousin or two keep telling my baby to take bottle and i should pump the breastmilk. I leave them to the wonderful idea of how easy to pump breastmilk and their life would be. Well, i won't deny i am a lazy mom. I don't like pumping because i found it time wasting. I prefer bonding with my baby during feeding and used other free times to play with her. I am a stay at home mom. I have the luxury to do that.
To those who not happy seeing my boobies, expect to see my baby less. I'll be more happy to accommodate your comfort. I cannot afford efficient, expensive electric breast pump so stop telling me to bottle-fed my baby. She will have all her life to drink and eating from glass or plastic or silverware or stainless steel. I just want her to feed from my own flesh for her first two year of life. Was that demanding?
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